Be Still My Bleeding Heart

This week I have been accused of being a bleeding heart leftie liberal.

This causes so many questions in my mind.

Firstly am I a leftie? A bleeding heart liberal?

And if I am why is that thrown around as an insult?

Let me give you some background. I have alluded to being a selfish piece of work in years gone past and how much I have changed (for the better) in the last few years. I have laid this change mainly as a result of Evie’s birth and diagnosis.

As a child I was brought up to care for others, to fight for our own and for what is right. I was also taught that charity begins at home. I was given strong principles, an excellent education and a belief in myself and my opinions. I became self interested. My own aims outweighed anyone else, friend, family or foe. I rarely listened to others. I became hardened to others’ plights. I worked hard. I believed then that I was good and fair at what I did.

And even then my seemingly leftie leanings were in sight on occasion. I remember attending a mediation seminar and being fascinated at the great work that decent intelligent mediators can achieve; particularly when comparing this to the intensive, highly argumentative and combative legal proceedings route.

I remember seeing lawyers crowing over the costs that they would get from this case or that and being incredibly annoyed at their lack of care for their clients and their own blatant self interest. I remember lawyers issuing proceedings for the sake of it, for money and sheer bloody mindedness.

I also remember lawyers similar to me. Cautious and fair. Truthful and putting their clients’ interests before their own. I remember the government attacks on the legal system forcing out of many of the good lawyers, and those that left battling and making money where they could.

I confess that when I was made redundant I had never been so happy. I had known that it was coming for a long time. I didn’t ‘fit’.& didn’t play their silly games. At the time my mum was seriously ill, I was heavily pregnant; we as a family had been through a series of losses and events that would make Eastenders look life real life, it was so unbelievable. I was relieved to remove a stress in my life. To concentrate on my mum, on Evie who was increasingly unwell and our expected baby.

We then lost my mum. And a few weeks later we lost Joshua through stillbirth.

These events (there were several other awful things), these traumatic life changing couple of years changed me. I had begun to soften when Evie was born, to realise that others were so much more important than me. Maybe this is when I became a bleeding heart leftie liberal.

In the last couple of years I’ve turned into a fighter for what is right. I will now fight for whoever and whatever I believe in. This I have always done to some extent but now I don’t care what others think of me. So I say my beliefs louder and stronger and longer. I know in my heart that I am doing what is right.

So what’s brought me to post about this? Of course the refugee crisis. I have argued on social media much about this. I’ve been trolled. I’ve been called responsible for a white genocide.

I ask is it so wrong to care for others?

Let’s be honest I am sure that the Syrians and other refugees from other countries didn’t want this to happen. I don’t profess to know it all. But you have to be pretty bloody desperate to put your family on an inflatable dinghy in the Mediterranean Sea or force yourself into a tiny space in an overladen truck, knowing that you were putting your life and those you love at risk.

I don’t know all about the Syrian conflict or all of the political fights within the world. What I do know is that if someone needs our help then we should try to give it. We are generally fortunate in this country. I count my lucky stars that we were born here.

I am ashamed of the diatribe and vitriole that I have seen people spouting on social media. The threats of violence, the utter lack of empathy.

I am conflicted in so many ways and I do understand in part why people say they don’t want refugees here, I really do….

I know that there is a lot of issues in this country, underfunded NHS, schools…I know all of this…I would have felt like this before….I probably would have been thinking similar things…..

BUT they are human beings. Just like us. It could be us. So my bleeding heart says help them.

Protect the weakest.

Have a heart.

Treat others as you would hope to be treated yourself.

(This incidentally is why I do worry about Evie. If people can be so awful about those in desperate need, how can I hope that they will care about Evie? For anyone wanting to argue with me….don’t bother. This post isn’t for argument, it’s my blog, I’m posting how I feel about issues that I care about. You don’t care? You feel differently? Fine. Move on. Blog about it. Leave me and my bleeding heart in peace)


3 thoughts on “Be Still My Bleeding Heart

  1. I think that social media is an interesting tool.As well as the hateful trolling,and violent bullying that is a real and frightening problem,I’m convinced that it makes us more of a community.I think that’s why people are organising themselves to send supplies to Calais,and petitioning.It breaks down country boundaries and makes people consider themselves to be part of a wider community,the human community.That has to be a good thing,particularly for us British who tend to want to keep our heads down and not be involved.
    We are all in this together,like it or not,left wing or right wing.

    Liked by 2 people

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